Miracle

I contemplated writing about this, but I decided it was something I needed to do in order to move on and heal.  I wouldn't be true to myself if I skipped over it like nothing happened and everything was just fine, because it hasn't been.

Monday afternoon our whole world came to a screeching halt.  Josh and I received a phone call that no parent ever wants to get...Julian had an accident and somehow rolled a walker down 6 hardwood floor stairs and fell out of it at the bottom.  (Take a minute to breathe...)

The moment I found out what had happened I was overcome with unimaginable fear, panic, anxiety...pain.  My head felt like it was going to explode...I could hardly breathe.  How could something like this happen!?  Was he going to be okay??  A million "what if's"...and unthinkable images swam across my mind as I raced to meet my mother-in-law at the doctor's office.  I could barely drive-everyone seemed to be driving so slow when all I wanted to do was get to my baby and hold him and make sure everything was okay.  I couldn't stop crying...I couldn't stop thinking "what if"...I couldn't stop asking God for him to please, please wake me up from this nightmare and let my baby come out of this unharmed...I couldn't stop thinking about how scary it must have been for him...I've never felt so sick with worry...my body had an actual physical reaction to this stress and I've never experienced anything like it in my entire life...It's hard for me to even think back about this, so I am going to stop right here and leave it where it is.

The minute I saw Julian all I could do was hold him close and protect him.  I felt some relief seeing that he seemed okay...we laid him down to check him over and Thank GOD he started smiling and cooing and acting like himself.  The doctor looked him over and there were no signs of head trauma or internal injuries.  It looked like he was going to be okay-the only visible sign was a small bruise on his right thigh so he had to get an X-Ray, but that turned up okay too.  A true miracle.

I stayed home (my wonderful manager let me work from home so I could be around him) the past couple of days and everything seems to be okay.  Things are back to normal now-I can't even think about what could have happened.  God was absolutely watching over him that day.  I am eternally grateful that he came out of all of this okay...all I've been doing these past few days is hugging and kissing my sweet, sweet baby boy and thanking God that he's okay...all of this is a huge reminder of how precious life is and to never take anything for granted, ever.

Here's a picture of him the day after the accident, acting cheerful and smiley!  Our baby is okay!